You Can't Go Right From Wrong

What do you do if you’re typing along and see that you’ve misspelled a word? You recognize it and fix it. You back up to where the wrong letter is and you delete it. You eliminate if from the word you’re looking to have convey an idea that seems worth your time to even express.

Why? Because you can’t spell a word right using a wrong letter. Is the expression of your life worth less relative energy, thought and commitment than you give to a written communication?

First: Recognize the wrong (or what isn’t working) in your life.

Second: Eradicate that wrong (or stupid/destructive behavior) by replacing it with what it’ll take to get you to express what you really want in your life.

Third: Enjoy the benefits of right living.

Repeat.

RR

PS Or you can make it more difficult, time consuming and life defining.

It's All Application

Who cares what you know if you won't do something with it?

• Applied knowledge is wisdom.

• Ignored knowledge is destructive.

• Denied knowledge is stupidity.

Since the problem in life is very rarely that we lack information, you can see the above three options for your choice in how to engage your life.

Doing Something,

RR

Decisive or Impulsive

I'm trying to figure this one out. Trying to be decisive, I know I've been impulsive. There is a difference because I know I've experienced different results from making swift decisions--which both words connote.

I definitely want to be one of those alluring and inspiring people we've each experienced or seen who sums up a situation and responds with the right amount of power. They're gentle and compassionate when required; they're assertive and precise when those qualities are required.

Looking "impulsive" up in the dictionary, I found the key. Impulsiveness is a quick decision that isn't well thought out (ill-considered). Fine. But I don't have all day to think things out if I'm trying to be decisive!

Ahh, but that's the point. Think! Think about various scenarios, think about why you do any thing specifically and many things in general. Know why you do what you do. Think about these things before the heat is turned up. JFK said, "The time to repair the roof is when the sun is shining."

It's in knowing what we believe and "why" that helps us move from quick ignorance (impulsiveness) to decisiveness.

Decidedly Yours,

RR

Since Your Mind is Democratic...

Majority rules! Say that and most people would shout some version of, "Amen!" or "Of course!"

Would it change your thinking if I told that America isn't a democracy?

Would it change your mind if I told you that James Madison, known as the Father of the Constitution, had this to say about democracy: Hence it is that democracies have ever been spectacles of turbulence and contention; have ever been found incompatible with personal security or the rights of property; and have in general been as short in their lives as they have been violent in their deaths.

A democracy is two wolves and one sheep deciding what is for dinner. No security, no higher principle and no natural freedom to appeal to in a democracy when 51% can be swayed and bind 100% of the population.

On the other hand, our minds are an awful lot like a democracy in that what we most think about, we become. If you want to change you need increase the volume and enthusiasm of those thoughts that reflect the best of you and your dreams and goals.

Wow, Ron! Interesting and informative!

Thanks,

RR

Feeling Uninspired

You know, one of the things that I really like about the personal growth industry is that there is so much good stuff for helping humanity of varying perspectives. Another thing I like is that it's all geared to making whatever is going on better by:

• helping people recognize and enjoy what they already have.
• helping people to learn to appreciate and find the richness in "now".
• helping people find motivation.

Ironically, one of the things that can be so irritating about the personal growth world is its tendency to...always make things better, happy, inspiring...

You know, sometimes I don't want to be inspired. Sometimes, I'm confused and need to regroup. Sometimes I'm uninspired--and trying to manufacture inspiration over a tumult of other feelings can be a rip-off to experiencing other human emotions. There is nothing wrong with feeling sad. Maybe I'm a bit disappointed or lost...uninspired.

There isn't one of us who occasionally lacks inspiration. It's okay. If the there is truth in my words, let them offer permission to you to not be inspired today.

This too is uncompromised.

RR

Hiding in the Inbox

People find 100 different ways to avoid doing what they must do if their lives are to be what they say they want them to be. What are your hideouts?

I remember, when I first got into business for myself, I ate...a lot! I didn't know how to be in business, I didn't know how to be responsible for my time -bottom line: I didn't know what to do and when I did, I lacked the courage to do it. So I ate.

I distinctly remember talking myself into the idea that I had to have a peanut butter sandwich so I had the energy to make some phone calls. As I sat in my kitchen eating, I realized that I was being a poser. I wasn't in business; I was kicking up dust to look like I was handling something necessary in a entrepreneur's day (eating).

I've got a couple important pieces of writing to do today...not to mention a couple of decisions I need to make -off I went to manage some emails! I caught myself pretty quickly and got to thinking how else do I make my actions look good but fail to follow through on what I know I actually have to do to live what I want.

Well I'll think more about that later but now, now I have a few things I've committed to that need my time. And you? What's your hideout?

Be Good - Don't Compromise,

RR

Patience and Polishing

I used to be a mason. I laid brick and stone; I plastered and poured concrete. It was messy, hard and sometimes downright painful work.

I remember though, that there would be occasions where I'd come 'out of the field' (off a job site) and into the workshop to do some more, fine work. One of the things I did occasionally was polish a stone countertop or the like.

Without giving a lesson on stone polishing, let me say this: It was fun, dignifying and very difficult in a different way. Working on yourself is like polishing a piece of stone.

The essence of polishing a piece of stone is that you have to use ever-decreasingly abrasive materials while increasing the speed of application so you can smooth and reveal the true color and shine in a stone -its identity of sorts.

Being the craftsman selected felt great but following through on the expectation of the finished product demanded dedication to a very high standard of quality and consistency not to mention the strength and persistence to carry out the task.

Isn't that like life?

Here you are the craftsman or craftswoman. Will you hold a high standard and patiently exert your strength and will to reveal your identity -the best of who you are?

Affectionately Bonded,

RR

Although It's Been Said Many Times, Many Ways...

Paralysis by analysis.

Just do it.

Do it now.

The early bird catches the worm.

Don't wait for your ship to come in; swim out to get it.

Ow. I get it...stop thinking and do!

Well I was doing P90X today -man you just have to appreciate the good stuff they put out- when Tony Horton nailed it. He went down to bang out some push-ups and said, "This is my speed." Good form but man he was flying...

I followed Tony's lead and did more push-ups than I'd expected and after the set he told me why. He said, "Get out of your head." Yeah!! No kidding. How many times have I (before I'd even started) talked myself out of a higher count and then succeeded at underachieving? No comment!

Tony's physical expression of: stop thinking and get going, is just what the doctor ordered for many of us. Stop thinking so much about balancing the checkbook; stop thinking about making that call and stop thinking about going for that dream. Do something -now!

Thanks, Tony.

RR

Awesome Distinction

This isn't mine. A friend, Camilla Rogers, found it someplace and it deserves more airtime and credit to whoever made this incredible distinction.

If anyone knows who said it, let me know, I'll amend this post ASAP.

The short setup on this is that Camilla and I were talking about how people (to include she and I) can get caught up in pretending we're going for something rather than sincerely wanting and working toward it. Here it goes:

A DREAM - An adult synergy of desire, imagination, and expectancy. A dream has a subtext of maximizing who you are, and a supertext of becoming more than you are.

A FANTASY - An adolescent adventure in imagination without any real desire and no solidly determined expectation. The "guts" are missing. The potential manifestation is seen as a threat and a source of fear rather than something to celebrate as a source of joy.

Whoa,

RR

Lookin' Good By Acting Aloof?

I watched a performance yesterday (it was a dress rehearsal) where two performers arrived late. Their colleagues were already there, practicing (dancing/singing), despite their absence.

As the two walked in, I sort of imagined them humbly mouthing the words "I'm sorry" or something like that -then briskly moving to get on stage to join their colleagues already engaged in their routine.

Nope.

They rolled their eyes at the director's comment that it was about time. They further denied the director and fellow performers as they leisurely de-frocked, got on stage and nonchalantly went through the motions of the performance.

Hey! Humble up! Apologize! Get engaged at 100% and move on!

Your being cool is not only irritating, but it impacts everybody around you. In the meantime you've exchanged lookin' good for something more fulfilling that's gotten only by giving yourself completely to what you do.

Thank You,

RR

The Wrong Lesson

Recently I was witness to someone giving their word to another that they ended up not keeping.

Sometimes the reason for people not following through is legit. Often, is simply isn't.

What is crazy is when the person who failed to do what they said, in an absurd linguistic-judo move, removes the yoke of responsibility from themselves and places the blame on the other!

I was left speechless just a few days ago when the blame was shifted from "Fred" (who didn't keep his word) to "Tom" (the guy who'd been promised then denied something). The lesson being discussed wasn't that Fred needs to keep his word. It was that Tom needs to show more mercy.

I almost fell out of my seat as I watched the offender turn teacher to the offended during the debrief of events. This happens more than we might generally realize. People can shift the blame everywhere but rarely affix it to themselves.

The Uncompromised, on the other hand, are quick to take responsibility. That is part of what makes them different, rare and extraordinary.

Dad's Wisdom

I used to be a mason (brick, block, concrete). It was there that I received a lot of life's best lessons. Today we'll talk about one of my dad's keepers.

I worked for my dad by the way. Now, say that to most people and the think something along the lines of, "posh gig" or "good deal being the boss' son".

Consider this: most people who've worked for family have a different perspective -as the expectations are usually much greater. My dad put everything in hock -mortgaged the house and everything for a shot at success in business. Not posh.

What does this equal? Urgency, rigor and a low tolerance for nonsense. At 18, I needed to learn all three.

There were occasions where we'd be done with all the work necessary and waiting on a concrete truck or a delivery. My dad couldn't stand idleness. In all seriousness, he'd snap- "Hey, Ronnie, sweep the floor, jog in place, Do Something!"

Bottom line: You are here to be productive -PRODUCE!

My bottom line? Have fun, yes... but Do Something!

RR

Mugged!

No, not at gun or knife-point -but in front of my computer!

I was checking out some links listed by a top blogger as places he'd leveraged to build his following. I'm keen on learning from people who know what I don't so down the list (several short lists on a long post) I went. Second to last grouping and second link down... Blam-O!

Up comes a site that was degrading and kind of intriguing (like a car accident) that I never expected to see. I was mugged. Out of nowhere I was confronted with something I didn't ask for and didn't want.

I quickly closed the window and with eyes bugged out of my head gasped, "What the..." I did complete the phrase.

'Muggings' are tests to see if we are who we say we are. You may be 'mugged' by a tray of cookies, a letter from the IRS, someone's irate response to you or a proposal of one sort or another. How you respond reveals you to yourself and the world.

How have you been mugged? What did you see in yourself?

How Do You Appeal?

An appeal was made to me recently that I kind of resent. Not only do I not feel honored or inspired by this appeal, I feel frustrated, and as I said... resentment.

I'm really quick to notice what I have to learn both in my own private life and on this blog but today I want to shine the light 'out there'.

The creators/discoverers of NLP Bandler/Grinder said it best when they said that the meaning of any communication is the meaning that is received. That puts the responsibility to communicate effectively directly on the shoulders of the one communicating.

I've noticed appeals from friends, families, strangers, high school kids wanting to sell $10 discount cards, Girl Scouts and their infernal delicious cookies and the bank teller who suddenly is excited about my banking needs as they chipper-ly tell me about their CD rate of - 1.45%.

When you want something, when you have an agenda... what do you do? Do you become someone else?? Do you turn on the charm? Do you manipulate emotions such as guilt or pity? Do you overwhelm with excitement? It's worth noticing.

What strikes me is that if the bank teller was always nice and friendly to me, asking curious question and/or connecting, I'd be much more open to hearing his/her pitch. It seems to me that we'd better engage people with the best in us, not just when we want something.

RR

4:30 AM

I never regret when I get up at 4:30 AM. In my house, it guarantees me two solid hours in total silence.

Benjamin Franklin said 10 or 20 years ago (plus or minus 250), "Early to bed, early to rise makes a man (women too) healthy, wealthy and wise." I'm down with that plan.

I know there are those who get that quiet time at night (I just don't get it) but regardless of when... get you some. If you are up to anything worthwhile -and this might be a test, you need that alone, quiet, writing, reflecting and/or creative time.

I'd fallen off the wagon recently as I started staying up later so I could do more over the course of a couple days. Well that turning into several days makes morning wake up later and later. Suddenly I'm working, not at my best (4:30-6:30 AM), but just 'doing more busy stuff' between 9 and 11. Not productive. Compromised. Fatigue... ug.

Sometimes it's hard to remember what you are investing in before you get the payoff. For me, getting to bed with a book at 9:30 preferably, and 10 for sure, guarantees a happy boy in the morning.

Oye! I'll let you know how I did this week on Thursday!

17 days until my book is due to the editor! I'd better get in bed... oh wait. It's 6:45 AM!

RR

Why Create??

Aint nothin' new gonna be said. Every note that there ever will be has been played, every color one could hope to put on canvas (or base of your choice) has been put there.

Books have been written, speeches given and songs composed. Basically it's the same stuff with a new marketing twist.

I used to think, "Man, the Beatles did Abbey Road, how could it get better... why would people bother trying to be better than that!?" Depending on your preference, the Bible, Torah or Koran, Tao de Ching, etc. have been written. What other wisdom is there. There aren't gonna be any new fundamentals...

The truth is not everyone likes The Beatles, and even though whatever you do has probably been done many times over, what the world needs is you, now.

Your way of speaking, your combination of colors, your unique perspective, your notes, spaces, chords and tempo, texture... we need you!

No wanna-be reheated version of Tony Robbins, John Lennon, Poe, or even Raphael will get the job done. What the world needs is you -stripped of the unessential nonsense yet out loud and inspired.

The faithful expression of your true identity is what will give you peace now, inspire others... and if you create for a living, we all do... it's what will sell.

Be Good-Do Great,

RR

Sabotage!

Oh man, ever catch yourself doing something you know you shouldn't or saying something you know better than utter? It's strange in that moment as your reality almost splits in two. You are there in the situation, physically as that pause button goes on and you begin a dialog inside your head!

It's really strange in those times of conscious compromise when you start becoming lawyer-man or lawyer-woman, using all kinds of verbal gymnastics to avoid the truth of a situation and sabotage something better. We renegotiate that which we'd already determined and are literally arguing on the side of sloth, laziness, procrastination, blame, fear, apathy...

Craziness! But that voice that has you eat another piece of cake or go to bed beyond the time you'd already determined is a real and really seductive 'voice'.

What is the antidote, Mr. Renaud? Well, take a look at the four Universal Standards of The Uncompromised philosophy. Consider Enthusiasm, Courage, Endurance and Integrity. Which US has been eroded sufficiently in your life that you are now considering acceptable the negotiation of your agreements to yourself?

I know for me (because of that %&*# app, Angry Birds) last night I stayed awake 25 minutes later than I wanted. 25 minutes might seems like no big deal but... the 25 minutes isn't the point (thought it is a breach of my word). The point is that in those 25 minutes I said to myself, "No matter what, this is my last game"... 15 times! Each time I said, "Oh well..." and played again.

Ug! It is a slippery slope when renegotiation becomes easy because compromise starts small, we get cozy with it and it becomes easy with the bigger things as well.

What are the little ways that you've compromised?

How long did you take??? ...to do what??

I write a blog for a local paper in Albany (NY) each Monday. I've been writing for some time and haven't experienced much trouble in saying something that has some value -and doing it in 30-45 minutes. That was until this Monday (8/23).

I wrote for 5 hours.

I posted it.

It was not good. Oh, it was not good.

I deleted it.

I struggled for a topic to write about.

Took 2 more hours to write something that was about 300 words!

http://blog.timesunion.com/success/the-uncompromised-honda-pilot/270/

Wow. Some days we just don't have it, at all!

Lessons for me? Write that blog in advance of my due date. I know, I know... I'm not sure what to say about another lesson but I do know that sometimes when a situation goes far past absurd, it can be surprisingly funny.

Wow... that was only 10 minutes!

RR

Watershed Moments

A watershed is where things come together to form or take on a new direction.

What are the moments that you most powerfully recall changing your life?

Who said what to you?

What did you see or do?

What decision did you make?

What were the circumstances?

I will never forget one watershed moment in my life. My brother confronted me with some hard truths regarding my decent into ignorance. It marked a turning point in my life that set me on a course for becoming a different person and doing what I so enjoy today: teaching and coaching.

I don't know if you can incite or predict a watershed moment and they aren't always cozy when they occur, but what you can do is choose how you'll respond to these moments.

On second thought, maybe you can make such a radical decision in your life that you can create a watershed moment. Hmmmm, what will yours be??

RR

What is Courage?

Courage is doing what 'must be' done. What is courage? Courage is:

1. saying no to another drink.
2. exercising when you don't want to.
3. remaining quiet.
4. speaking up!
5. saying, "I love you".
6. departing when you know something isn't right.
7. speaking up when something is wrong.
8. forgiving.
9. seeing yourself in the humblest of society.
10. acknowledging the greatness within ourselves.
11. sacrificing for another.
12. holding on another moment.
13. keeping your word even when no one would know if you didn't.
14. doing the hard thing.
15. doing what is easy to put off doing.
16. saying what you believe
17. being humble
18. reading a book who's author you don't expect to agree with.
19. smiling anyway.
20. asking for help.

What is courage? Look to The Uncompromised.

RR